Along with the promise of healing me, I believed God would provide opportunities for me to gain new perspectives, learn valuable lessons, and inspire positive changes in my life and my family’s. That once my treatment is finished and I continue to recover and live, that we will be much stronger in all aspects of life.
There are many lessons I have learned throughout this season but here are 6 realizations during my chemotherapy journey:
1. Don’t underestimate the power of prayer.
Whenever I pray for someone or others, I feel more compassionate, empathetic and hopeful. But sometimes, I also feel my prayers are not enough, I feel like I have to do something for that person. Like physically go my way to offer help or contribute to the solution of their problems and answered prayers. I experience a strong “call to action” when I pray for others, feeling that I should do more than just set aside a few minutes to lift them up to God.
But during my cancer journey, God showed me that prayer is indeed powerful and sufficient on its own. Sometimes, we need to witness how God moves in the lives of those we pray for.
Ultimately, we are entrusting all our fears, worries, and doubts to a powerful and sovereign God. From my own experience, when someone prays for me and tells me they are praying for me, I genuinely feel my strength, energy, and spirit being renewed.
2. Life has no limitations, except for the ones we create.
I saw this post on Instagram and I could not agree more!
“You can have 1000 problems in your life until you have a health problem … Then you only have one problem.”
A lot of the things I want to do and accomplish as I heal and recover are the same dreams and goals I had even before my cancer diagnosis. Which led me to ask myself “So what’s stopping you then, Icai?”.
You have the energy.
You have the resources.
You have the time.
You will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do, than by the things you did do.
So stop telling yourself “One day … ” and change it to Day One instead.
Don’t wait for the perfect time to start, just start and figure out things along the way. On your deathbed, what will you wish you spent more time doing? And what will you wish you spent less time doing?
Please don’t wait until it’s too late. Start living out the life that only exists in your head.
3. It’s okay if all you do today is breathe.
Don’t be too hard on yourself on days when you feel unproductive or as if you haven’t accomplished anything.
The transition from my pre-chemo self to my during-chemo self has been incredibly tough, marked by a lot of negative self-talk. I’m not accustomed to doing nothing; I’ve always been on the go.
Chemotherapy drained my energy and, in many ways, took the life out of me. I struggled to accept the slowness and inactivity during those initial months. Thankfully, these periods of inactivity became times of quiet with God. I found myself listening to Him, to my body, and to my own breathing. It turns out, this was exactly what I needed at the time.
I came to realize that sometimes, we need to stop resisting and simply surrender to appreciate the beauty of the present.
4. You are stronger when you feel “weak”.
When you reflect on it deeply, you realize that you can be stronger during times when you feel “weak.” In these moments of perceived vulnerability, I uncovered a profound inner strength. It’s during these periods that I learnerd to rely on faith, patience, and the support of those around me.
Feeling weak compelled me to slow down, truly listen, and value the small victories. This quiet strength, emerging from surrender, revealed a resilience I hadn’t recognized before. Embracing our weakest moments allows us to discover our true power and appreciate the beauty in life’s simplest gifts.
5. Say “Yes” to yourself first.
We focus on our physical appearance too much that we neglect our mental and spiritual health. Yes, you look good on the outside but you could be dying inside.
Showing up for others is good but I hope you show up for yourself too, you stand up for yourself too. I must admit, before my diagnosis, I was accustomed to only saying “No” to myself. I was a people pleaser, always prioritizing others’ needs and desires over my own, often at the cost of my own well-being.
I was raised and labeled as the “golden child,” which often made the need to make sure I don’t make others feel uncomfortable, a persistent concern. As a result, I rarely set boundaries or took time for myself. Being a people pleaser led me to frequently neglect my own needs and desires. I struggled to say “No” to requests, even when I was stretched thin or needed a break. I thought that being constantly available and accommodating was the right approach, but in reality, I was neglecting my own health and happiness.
My diagnosis was a wake-up call that made me reassess my priorities and appreciate the importance of self-care. I realized that saying “No” to others doesn’t make me a bad person; it simply means I’m respecting my own limits and taking care of myself.
Learning to say “Yes” to myself was a pivotal step in my life. It involved prioritizing my health, setting boundaries, and recognizing that my needs are as important as anyone else’s. This shift has been challenging but also profoundly empowering. It has helped me cultivate a healthier relationship with myself and others, enabling a more balanced and sustainable exchange of support.
6. Answered prayers does not always come in neatly wrapped packages.
When I was diagnosed with cancer, it felt like many doors were closing. However, in His sovereignty, God revealed that even during this challenging period, many doors and opportunities would open for both me and my family.
True enough, as I went through chemotherapy, we managed to get our own home, connect with new people who offered us blessings and encouragement, and even rekindle relationships with friends and relatives I hadn’t spoken to in years.
My prayer to stay home and start homeschooling Hopesie full time also came to fruition during this period. It was a true gift! Even in what felt like an ending, many new beginnings and opportunities blossomed right before our eyes.
These realizations have changed my life for the good. I pray and hope that if we ever have to go through something unexpected or difficulty beyond our capabilities, that we turn to the God that loves us. He sees us. He knows us. Perhaps He allows the situation for us to be redirected to Him.
